My Jesus

I've been trying to blog for some time about some issues I've been having since I returned to Dallas two years ago. For two long years, I've been looking for a church home. You'd think in a city the size of Dallas I'd be able to find one. But I can't find a theology I agree with... at least not in any of the traditional Baptist churches in the area.

See, I'm fed up with the way Jesus is presented in a lot of churches these days. Most churches present the Gospel as an open-ended invitation to come to Jesus, ignoring the fact that the Bible clearly states that He calls some and not others. When He says, "Come to me, you who are heavy-laden, and I will give you rest," those that come do so at the leading of the Holy Spirit. I've heard many stories of people who go almost literally kicking and screaming (Augustine, C.S. Lewis, Josh McDowell, Lee Strobel). And yet most churches don't present it in that way. They talk of leading someone to Christ, when in reality we have absolutely nothing to do with it. It is entirely the leading of the Holy Spirit. Dead people can't raise themselves, and Romans says we are dead in our transgressions, made alive in Christ.

I'm also fed up with the presentation of Christ as only for those that have their lives straight. I know I'm guilty of this too. In most churches, they preach of forgiveness and repentance to people who hide their sin incredibly well. But Jesus ate dinner with thieves and prostitutes and tax collectors - the lowest of the low. How often do we invite prostitutes and strippers and homeless people to our churches? If they came, would any of us talk to them? Would any of us sit by them?

I heard this song by Todd Agnew yesterday, and it convicted me so much it hurt. I don't usually like a lot of Todd Agnew's stuff (musically speaking anyway), but check out the words to this song.

My Jesus - Todd Agnew

Which Jesus do you follow?
Which Jesus do you serve?
If Ephesians says to imitate Christ
Then why do you look so much like the world?

'Cause my Jesus bled and died
He spent His time with thieves and liars
He loved the poor and accosted the arrogant
So which one do you want to be?

Blessed are the poor in spirit
Or do we pray to be blessed with the wealth of this land?
Blessed are they that hunger and thirst for righteousness
Or do we ache for another taste of this world of shifting sand?

'Cause my Jesus bled and died for my sins
He spent His time with thieves and sluts and liars
He loved the poor and accosted the rich
So which one do you want to be?

Who is this that you follow?
This picture of the American dream
If Jesus was here would you walk right by on the other side
Or fall down and worship at His holy feet?

Pretty blue eyes and curly brown hair and a clear complexion
Is this how you see Him as He dies for your sins?
But the Word says He was battered and scarred
Or did you miss that part?
Sometimes I doubt we'd recognize Him.

'Cause my Jesus bled and died
He spent His time with thieves and the least of these
He loved the poor and accosted the comfortable
So which one do you want to be?

'Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church
The blood and dirt on His feet would stain the carpet
But He reaches for the hurting and despises the proud
I think He'd prefer Beale Street to the stained glass crowd
And I know that He can hear me if I cry out loud
I wanna be like You, Jesus!
I wanna be like You, Jesus!

Not a poster child for American prosperity, but like my Jesus
You see, I'm tired of living for success and popularity
I wanna be like my Jesus, but I'm not sure what that means to be like You, Jesus
'Cause You said to live like You, love like You, but then You died for me
Can I be like You, Jesus?
I wanna be like my Jesus.

Christmastime is here...

I feel like writing a random blog tonight.  Mostly because I'm hanging out with a bunch of people that are studying, but I don't have any homework.  And I have absolutely no idea how that happened.  Seems like over the past couple of weeks, I've done nothing but homework.  And it kinda sucks.  Thank God for the end of the semester.  I'm starting to wonder if I made the right choice in taking another class.  Ah, at least I'll graduate a semester early.

Started thinking about grad school not too long ago.  It's weird that it's less than a year away.  Two years ago I wasn't even sure I'd make it through college.

Grad school's scary.  Especially with the prospect of going to a secular university.  I didn't even go to a secular high school... or middle school... OR elementary school.  And then there's my field of people who are probably as delusional as most of their clients.  A field with guys like Freud... oh Freud.  Now THAT guy had issues.  I don't know if many of you four people that read my blog have actually looked at Freud's life.  His life pretty much mirrors his theory.  You know that whole Oedipus complex thing, where the little boy falls in lust with his mother and wants to kill his father,  but is afraid of his father finding out that he loves his mother and then cuts off his man-parts?  I'm pretty sure Freud suffered from that one too.  He was a momma's boy, through and through.  He lived with his mother until her death, if I remember correctly.  It's odd how a lot of modern psychologists still hold to the guy that developed his theory by analyzing himself.  I'm all for self-awareness, but that's just a little ridiculous.

ANYWAY... Grad school scares me.  When did I get old enough for grad school?  I'm about to turn twenty-one in just over a week.  The scary thing is, I barely remember seventeen!  

For that matter, when did I get old enough for people younger than me to get married?!  I was invited to THREE weddings over the Christmas break.  THREE!  Over Christmas!  That's what, just six weeks?  And it seems like everyone around me is getting engaged too.  And I keep wondering, when did this happen?  When did I become an adult?  I don't even remember it happening.  It's like someone flipped a switch and said, "Okay, you're an adult!"  No seamless transition, no warning, no nothing.

So I just realized that I've talked a lot about stuff that's completely irrelevant from the title.  Shows you just how random of a mood I'm in.  CHRISTMAS TIME IS HERE!!!!!!

I'm so excited for Christmas.  This is by far my favorite time of the year.  For some reason, and I know this is going to sound really naive, but everyone just seems happier this time of year.  Forget about all the crazy shoppers on Black Friday or the week before Christmas.  I don't know... there's just this sense of joy and expectation that starts right before Thanksgiving and continues through Christmas.  It's this excitement that sort of hangs in the atmosphere.

I haven't quite figured out if it's the expectation of presents, or family, or food, or just the thrill that comes with celebration.  Maybe it's the carols.  Christmas carols rock.  I love playing Christmas carols on my guitar.  Aaannnyyway... I haven't quite figured out what makes everyone so happy this year.  I know people are inherently selfish, so it's probably not the joy of giving.  Maybe it's the joy of getting...... I know people aren't all religious, so it can't be the joy of celebrating the birth of Jesus or the Hanukkah.  Not everyone has a family, so it can't be the joy of gathering with friends and family.  Not everyone likes the cold, so it can't be the snow... heck we don't even get snow here in Texas!

I really can't figure it out.  And it's going to bug me.  

I know what makes this such an exciting time of year for me.  For me, it's all the things that I mentioned.  I'm a human, so I'm inherently selfish too, and I fully admit that I love getting gifts.  But at the same time, I love giving gifts too... I like it when I make people happy, even if they don't like what I get them.  I'm religious, so celebrating the birth of my Savior brings me so much joy, remembering that He had to be born in order to die for my sins and be raised to life again.  I love my friends and family, and Christmas gives us an excuse to take a break from our busy lives to catch up and find out what's going on with everybody.  I even love the cold!

Maybe I shouldn't try to figure it out.  Maybe I should just sink back into my naive little world and enjoy everyone's "happiness" during this time of year.

It's the end of the world as we know it...

It seriously is the end of the world as we know it.

Before Tuesday, I had high hopes for America. I firmly believed that America would look past the empty promises and appearances of the most liberal candidate ever to run for POTUS in the history of the United States. I firmly believed that America would stand for traditional ideals of conservatism, and that we could keep this trend of socialism from fully coming to pass.

I was wrong.

And I wept for America on November 4, 2008. I wept for what I saw her becoming. I cried when it looked like conservatism died.

I want to take the time to break down why I think Obama won and McCain lost. Some of what I have to say isn't the general consensus, but this is what I saw happening.

McCain ran a lousy campaign. He alienated conservatives (until he selected Sarah Palin), and he didn't mobilize young voters using means like Facebook and Myspace. He didn't try to get the funds that Obama garnered (although I have to wonder how many of those funds came from his mob connections). Sarah Palin DID NOT cause him to lose. If anything, his choice of her as his running mate drew real conservatives like me into the campaign. I don't believe the smears about her before and after the election. I think those were caused by his campaign managers trying to cover their butts and shift the blame from them. They ran a lousy campaign! He didn't utilize Obama's nefarious connections with Wright and Ayers - in fact, his campaign managers and aides spent more time smearing Sarah Palin than they did Obama. He came across as wishy-washy and unclear. He never took a strong stand on the issues, unlike Sarah Palin. And he muzzled her when she was obviously the bright spot in his campaign.

Obama ran an excellent campaign. He mobilized young voters and used the people's dissatisfaction with the current administration to get voters. His promises were good and enticing, though anyone with a brain and knowledge of history could see right past them to what they were. He's one heck of an orator, and he knew how to get crowds fired up. And (dare I say it) he used his race, and people who had never voted before turned out en mass to vote for him.

In the days after this election, the world has seemed different to me in a way. I see a lot of changes coming our way - and none for the better. Just two days after the election, Russia is poised to begin its reconquest of the former Soviet Union by force. Iran, for the first time, has congratulated the United States in its election of the most liberal president in history. Hamas fired missles at Israel. Africa celebrated like nothing I've ever seen. Just two days after the election, Obama has already chosen as his chief of staff one of the most aggressive Democrats I've ever seen, a man who has threatened people that stand for conservatism. Other Democrats are already starting their in-fighting, vying for power. He has promised to take away the missile defense system that Bush put in place after 9/11. He's promised to create a militia-like army under the control of the federal government. And it's downright scary.

But I still have hope. Conservatism is not dead here in America. It is in exile, but it is not dead.

57 million people turned out to vote for John McCain and Sarah Palin. A whole slew of young conservatives and right-leaning moderates are organizing on the Internet to put conservatism back in the Congress in 201o and in the White House in 2012. We're frightened by what we see, but as Laura Ingraham said yesterday, this is in no way a defeat for conservatism. We may be down, but we are not out. We voted on the issues, not on the candidate. I think about Michele Bachmann in Minnesota, the victim of a vicious smear campaign by Nancy Pelosi and a Congresswoman from one of the most Democrat-leaning states in the Union. And she was reelected on Tuesday. She's promised to fight tooth and nail for conservative values. Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, and Rush Limbaugh are still on the radio, talking about how the GOP needs to reform and steps we need to take to make sure we still have a voice.

I want to see conservatism redefined. What are conservative values? What do we stand for? What defines us? These are going to be the questions we need to ask in the next four years.

I want to see a new group of conservatives rise up in the GOP. I'm not a member of the GOP, but I still feel like if they can make some major reforms in the party, it will still be a strong force for conservative values. I look for people like Michele Bachmann, Mitt Romney, Mike Huckabee, Bobby Jindal, and Sarah Palin - young spitfires who are pumped up about maintaining the Constitution, limiting government, and protecting family. Don't for one moment count Sarah Palin out of this. She made some mistakes in this election, partly because of her inexperience in the public eye. But she's a politician through and through, and if we give her four years, I have no doubt that she could be a great choice for a position of power in the Republican party, if not as president or vice-president, then in a cabinet position or in the Senate.

I want to see young conservative like me rise up and say that we're tired of being lumped in with the liberal youth of this country. Some of us know what the Constitution says and what it means. Some of us know history and understand the impact that this choice for president will have on this country and the world. We know how to utilize technology to get people fired up for conservative values, and we can mobilize people like no other generation in the past. Don't count us out just yet.

It's entirely possible that Barack Obama could be a good president. I worry about some of his policies, and I think that his choices for his cabinet are very telling about the kind of policies he plans to implement. No matter what, I'll still pray for God to guide him in his leadership of America and I congratulate him on his victory.

One thing that I've been hearing is that it's always darkest before the dawn, and I think that's true. We can use this time to regroup and to work the Conservative Underground. We can use this time to band together and unite for the values that our Founding Fathers held dear. God still remains sovereign, God still is on the throne, and God is still the God of this nation. "My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness. I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly lean on Jesus' name. On Christ the Solid Rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand!"

God bless America. Even now.

Talk about a nail-biter...

Today I voted for the first time. I know... 20 years old and voting for the first time? I don't really have a good explanation other than I was nearly 17 for the 2004 election, and I didn't really care about the 2006 election.

But this one I care about. Because, like many people, I understand that this is a turning point in our nation's history.

No matter what, this will be an election for the history books. We will either have America's first African-American president and its first Catholic VP, or we'll have America's oldest president and first woman VP. Let me say from the beginning that I admire and respect all four candidates. It takes a lot of hard work to get as far as they've gotten, be it a governorship or a chair in the Senate. It takes a lot of guts to be the first-whatever, and it takes a lot of ambition to attempt to run for our nation's highest and second-highest offices.

Now to the reason I'm writing this particular entry.

I've been asked several times in the last couple of weeks who I'm voting for in this historical election. Up until about May, I had absolutely no idea. I knew nothing about Barack Obama, and I didn't particularly like John McCain (waffles too much for me). The media seems to like Obama for president, which is all well and good. But as I was listening to the media and listening to what Obama said, I realized something.

I can't, in good conscience, vote for Barack Obama.

--It's not because he's Black. I could care less whether the man was black, white, pink, orange, red, or yellow. If an African-American with good character and good politics ran for president, I'd vote for him in a heartbeat.

--It's not because he's Democrat. I'm not a Republican, I'm not a Democrat, I'm not a Libertarian. I'm an Independent. I registered that way because I don't want to hold to any party whatsoever. There are things in all the parties that I agree and disagree with, and I refuse to let partisanship stand in the way of voting according to my conscience.

--It's not because he's Muslim, or whatever he is. I could care less if the guy was Muslim, Hindu, Christian, Sikh, Jewish, or even some obscure tribal religion from the Pacific Islands. The Constitution says that a person's qualifications to hold office do not rest on their religious affiliation, and since the Constitution is the highest law of the land, I completely support it. Come to think of it, I have absolutely no idea what his religion is.

--It's not because I'm a feminist and want to see a woman get one of the highest offices in the country. While I admit, it would be nice, I honestly don't care. A person's gender has absolutely nothing to do with politics, or at least it shouldn't. We've survived for over 250 years without a woman president or vice-president, and I have a feeling we could survive without one for as long as this nation exists. We're not Britain.

Here's why I can't, in good conscience, vote for Barack Obama.

-- Abortion.  Over fifty MILLION children have been killed since Roe v. Wade in 1973.  That's over fifty million potential presidents, Bill Gates, governors, congressmen, fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters.  Not only does Barack Obama support Roe, he also supports expanding the Court's decision to include partial birth abortion and limit even further the parental notification laws.  Partial birth abortion - where the doctor takes the child as it's coming through the birth canal, stabs it in the head with a pair of forceps, sucks out its brains until the skull caves in, and then pulls it out to dispose of it.  Does this sound humane?  As Christians, we are to value life and value children.  Proverbs says that children are a gift from God, and blessed is the man who has many of them.  Life, especially unborn life, is to be valued and protected, not thrown away because of some selfish urge to maintain a wild lifestyle or to not deal with a genetic problem like Down's Syndrome.

-- Homosexuality.  I'm not calling him gay, because I know he's not.  I don't hate homosexuals.  But I do believe, and Scripture backs me up, that homosexuality is a sin.  In Leviticus, God says that a man lying with another man is an abomination.  Just look at Sodom and Gomorrah.  Those two cities were wiped off the face of the earth because of their debase lifestyle.  And what is the sin that they committed?  Homosexuality.  It is a perversion of something good and beautiful that God created for a husband and wife to experience together.  Barack Obama supports allowing homosexual marriage.  He believes that homosexuality is not a choice (and there is no medical evidence to suggest that it is inborn).

-- Jeremiah Wright.  Now you and I both know that since Wright's debacle a few months ago, Obama has tried to distance himself from his former mentor.  But you and I also know that you can't spend twenty years calling a person "a close friend and mentor" without picking up some of his beliefs.  And Jeremiah Wright believes some outlandish stuff.  He is racist, claiming that God is for the African-American community alone.  And if He's not, Jeremiah Wright believes that that God deserves to die.  It's a heresy known as "Black Liberation Theology", developed by Dr. James Cone in the 1960's.  Look it up.  It'll raise the hairs on the back of your neck.

-- The economy.  We all know that the economy is in severe economic recession.  It's perfectly obvious.  Obama's taxation plan absolutely and completely sucks.  70% of all income tax is payed by 10% of Americans.  He claims to give the middle class a tax break, but in reality the middle class pays only about 30% of all income tax.  So where does that leave us?  It leaves us with CEO's of major companies having to deal with an enormous tax hike, which leads to job cuts to maintain profit margins, which leaves us with paying huge sales taxes on things like electronics and food and gasoline.  Yeah, that's right.  You think gas prices are bad now, just wait.  Oh, and by the way -- gas prices didn't skyrocket until we elected a Democratic Congress in 2006.  Jobs didn't decrease until we elected a Democratic Congress in 2006 (in fact, the number of jobs was on the rise).

-- History.  I'm a student of history.  I love learning about the past, for three reasons.  1) I believe that the past gives us a basis for the present; 2) I believe that the past helps us in the future; and 3) I believe that unless we understand the past, we're doomed to make its mistakes.  Studying the history of the United States reveals a lot of interesting facts.  Our nation's fathers feared a true democracy, a true rule by the people.  That's why, in the original Constitution, the only branch of the government elected by the people was the weakest branch - the House of Representatives.  They have a limited role in Congress, evidenced by a short term.  They are the only branch designed to reflect a popular vote.  In the original Constitution, the Senate was selected by the various state legislators.  The Founding Fathers recognized that a country cannot be run by people who do not understand government.  Those that were to be elected to high positions of authority were supposed to be highly educated people, familiar with philosophy and law and history.  They were to be the elite.  And instead, we've placed the government where it does not belong - in the hands of the people.

That's not the only thing that history teaches us.  Look at the Communist revolution in Russia in 1917.  Russia then was in a severe economic depression, and the people were calling for help.  And that's where Communism begins.  Lenin and Stalin promised the people money, equalization.  Sound at all familiar?  But the people sold them their souls, and Russia entered into a seventy-year period of oppression.  Equalization?  Bull crap.  Look at Germany after World War I.  Severe economic depression with high rates of unemployment and widespread poverty.  Along comes Adolf Hitler, promising to return Germany to its glory days, end the poverty, bring it back to a world power.  And what did it cost?  Historians estimate nearly eight million people were murdered at the hands of the Nazis -- homosexuals, gypsies, Slavs, Jews, Blacks, people with Down's Syndrome.  The same kind of genetic euthanasia that we're seeing with unborn children.  Look at Fidel Castro.  Same kind of promises -- jobs, power, money.  And look what it got them.  Religious oppression.  Economic depression.  Widespread poverty.  History has lessons for us to learn, folks.

--Socialism.  Barack Obama has said that his tax plan will open up the chance for those coming behind us to have money, to equalize us.  There's a fundamental flaw in his logic, though.  America is already the land of opportunity.  It is illegal to discriminate based on race, ethnicity, creed, sexuality, gender, and a number of other things.  Chances are already open for people to make money by working hard and saving even more.  Barack Obama's plan takes money from these hard-working Americans and gives it to people who might not be working so hard.  I don't know about you, but I don't want other people getting the money that I rightfully earned.  That's socialism, people.  It's trying to equalize everyone.  The problem is that not everyone is equal.  We seem to have this skewed sense of fair play.  Hate to tell you this, but life isn't fair.

Here's the real deal.

I don't particularly like John McCain (now Sarah Palin, I like.  I happen to disagree with the vast majority of people, because I think that she can be trusted with our nation's secrets.  She already is).  But I refuse to vote for a man that stands for the exact opposite of everything I believe.  I know America's going to hell in a handbasket, and it has been for some time.  But I firmly believe that if Barack Obama is elected, it will get there a lot faster.  And if I can do something to slow that process, I will.

In the meantime, I gotta start packing, because I just might be moving to Canada after next Tuesday.

Grace, I call your name...

I don't really get to say this too often.

Chapel Wednesday was absolutely, positively amazing.

I haven't exactly been challenged recently in my walk with Christ. You see, I go to a church that is... well... struggling. They're much more preoccupied with trying to find a pastor that meets the needs of the over-fifty crowd, and they're not too concerned with making sure that the younger college students, like myself, get fed. To be completely honest, I started going to the church so that I could play music and sing again, not because the preaching was awe-inspiring. And, in all actuality, there are maybe two or three people there that are concerned about our spiritual well-being at all.

Because of this, I've been feeling really empty lately. It's like all the passion built up inside of me from last semester just dissipated. And I have no idea where it went. I don't want to get up for church. I definitely, especially don't want to go to chapel. Except for Wednesday.

The reason I'm prefacing a blog about chapel like this is because I'm just amazed at how God sends along an incredible message exactly when I needed to hear it. I wasn't even planning on going to chapel on Wednesday. I had to get up incredibly early to take a 7:30 shuttle shift for a friend, and I'd only gotten about five hours of sleep that night. I was exhausted, and I figured that chapel would just be as mundane and unimaginative as usual.

But then I found out from a guy in my history class that Josh Patterson, one of the executive pastors at the Village, was going to be speaking. I decided at the last minute to go. And I'm so glad I did.

Grace.

He talked about grace. And it was so... incredible to hear that part of his testimony. See, he didn't operate under the "true love waits" policy before he got married, partly because he didn't grow up in an environment where that was emphasized. His wife did. His wife went to a doctor and found out that he'd given her a disease that could only have come from his sordid past. His wife, the innocent party in the whole mess, got sick because of his mistake. But she didn't blame him, even though she could've. She showed him grace.

And I got convicted. Very, very convicted.

Because, in struggling with this loss of passion, I've also been struggling with something much more subversive.

I've been struggling with lust.

Man, that feels so good, getting that out in the open.

I've been struggling with my thought life. I won't go into any details, but it should suffice to say that it's been an issue for well over a year. Not about anyone in particular, nothing out in the open, but I have a bad habit of letting my imagination get away from me. And that's a sin. Christ said so. He said, "Anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Substitute the word "man" for "woman" and "him" for "her", and you get my sin.

My sin is just as bad as someone who commits murder. Sin is sin in the eyes of the Lord. Even though it's not out in the open, it's still sin. And it still deserves to be punished, just like someone who commits murder or adultery or whatever.

But what I realized, listening to him talk, was that I've been shown just the same measure of grace that he has. My sin was nailed on the cross next to his, and because God chose me from the foundations of the earth, my sin has been forgiven, just like his. I have been saved by grace, because I was dead in my transgressions. I am a child of the King, though I was once a slave to darkness. Even though I continually struggle with this sin, it has been covered by the blood of the Lamb.

So let me take this to the next logical step. If I have been saved by grace, shouldn't I show the same amount of grace to a brother or sister that harms me? I have no right to be self-righteous, even to someone whose sin is not so latent. Can I really have the audacity to deny someone forgiveness just because they did something to hurt me? In the words of Paul, God forbid! I cannot, by the laws of grace, hold a brother or sister in judgment. I forgive because I've been forgiven.

And in thinking about all of this, I realize that I've been incredibly self-righteous. I have a terrible tendency to point out the faults of others, whether it's swearing or immorality or whatever. In reality, I have no right to sit in judgment of the sins of others. Judgment is in the hands of God, and not in mine. I have the obligation to show my brothers and sisters, and even those that don't believe, the same magnitude of grace that I've been shown.

Because, grace is unmerited favor. I sure didn't deserve it. I sure know people that didn't deserve it. But it was given to me anyway.

Declaration of Independence

Happy 4th of July, everyone!

I know that today is the day for barbecues and fireworks and pool parties, but let's think for a minute about what this day is supposed to mean for us Americans. Regardless of political beliefs, today is the day that we celebrate our independence, our freedom. And I think that this deserves some thought in between all the pool parties and hamburgers.

Most of us have had American history at some point in our lives, so we know about the signing of the Declaration of Independence and the Revolutionary War. But did you know that America is an anomaly in the world? We are the only country to have ever had a successful revolution that established a permanent form of government. The French revolution failed, and Napoleon took over as a dictator. The Cuban revolution brought in Castro. I'd say we're pretty blessed to have made it this far, despite our young history.

The Declaration of Independence is one of the greatest documents in history, up there with the Magna Carta. Jefferson was a master of words. Lines like "We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal, and are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, such as life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" have become the cornerstone for our system of law and government. Later, the Constitution of the United States became the backbone for law, the ruler by which all legal and political decisions in our country have been measured for the past 250 years. But even the Constitution is based on this great document, one that established America as an independent nation.

The 4th of July celebrates the Declaration of Independence. This document made the King of England realize that we wouldn't back down, that we had expectations of freedom, and that we were willing to die to gain that freedom. And that attitude of freedom has prevailed for the past 250 years. But I would argue that America's independence was not gained through this magnificent document. In fact, the United States of America did not become a nation until 1781, when General Cornwallis surrendered to George Washington. No, American independence does not rest on any document. American independence was won, and is still being won, by the men that died to make it the most powerful nation in the world.

We enjoy the freedom to speak our opinions, the freedom to worship whatever God we please, the freedom to bear arms and confront our accusers because of those patriots that died in the American revolution. We enjoy this freedom because of those men that fought to keep our independence in the War of 1812. We enjoy this freedom because of the men that fought to keep the Union together and free the slaves, and the men that fought for their ideals, in the Civil War. We enjoy this freedom because of the men that died in the trenches in World War I. We enjoy this freedom because of the men that were decimated in World War II in order to stop a homicidal, megalomanaical madman who murdered 6 million Jews and more than 1 million people of other races and creeds. We enjoy this freedom because of the men that sacrificed themselves for an unpopular war in Vietnam. And we still enjoy this freedom today, because of the men and women fighting another unpopular war in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Regardless of your political beliefs, these men and women deserve to be appreciated, thanked, and supported. They fight for our independence, carrying on the great tradition begun in 1776. They fight for the ideal that all men are created equal. They fight so that you can sleep safe and comfortable at night. They fight so tht you can choose whether to support the war or not.

I'm proud of my dad, a soldier who is overseas now protecting our country. I'm proud of my friends that have been overseas, fulfilling their duty to this country. I'm proud of all our soldiers, past and present, who give up everything for God and country. So today, when you're eating your barbecue and watching the pretty fireworks, remember those men and women that have died to protect your freedom and my freedom. Remember those men that risked their lives to build this country into what it is. And thank God that you have the freedom to eat your barbecue and watch your fireworks. 

Captivate Me

I'm complacent.

I've come to that conclusion recently.  I'm incredibly complacent.

My spiritual life is wonderful when I'm at school.  When my friends are here, when I have daily theological conversations, when I'm constantly surrounded by the Word.  But when everyone goes home, when I don't have daily contact with my core group of friends, my spiritual life goes down the tubes.  And I feel it.  I feel it in my very being.

A few minutes ago, I was sitting in a coffee shop having yet another theological discussion with a friend who came in for the evening (I'm still sitting in said coffee shop, but my friend is playing his guitar right now, so we're not conversing).  And I suddenly realized that I can't remember the last time I read my Bible.  I can't remember the last time I prayed.  I can't even remember the last time I spent quality time with God.

I miss the feeling of just being captivated by the Lord.  I miss the wonder of seeing His face on a daily basis, of going to my friends with a problem or a theological issue.  It's not totally bad, since I do have some friends that are still here.  It's not like I'm necessarily doing anything bad... I still go to church and everything.  But it feels like a facade, a mask that I put on.  And I hate it.  I hate not being real with myself, with my friends, and with God.  There's just no desire whatsoever, no passion, no real love for being in His presence.

It's a sad statement to my faith if I have to rely on friends to keep me accountable.  It's a sad statement to my spiritual health if I can't even take the time to read my Bible or, heck, even play a worship song in the privacy of my room.

You know what I just realized?  I'm in a desert of my own making.  And yet... somehow I feel like... I don't know.  Maybe God needs me to be in this place to finally get my attention again.  I'm a stubborn person.  It's one of my less-desirable qualities.  

So here I am, figuratively on my knees, waiting for You to come and captivate me.  Take all of the thoughts I've been having that aren't glorifying to You.  Take all my selfish desires.  Take all my complacency.  I need passion again.  I need desire.

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Your face is beautiful, and Your eyes are like the stars

Your gentle hands have healing, there inside the scars

Your loving arms, they draw me near, and Your smile, it brings me peace

Draw me closer, O my Lord, draw me closer, Lord, to Thee

Captivate us, Lord Jesus, set our eyes on You

Devastate us with Your presence, falling down,

Rushing River, draw us nearer,

Holy Fountain, consume us with You

Captivate us, Lord Jesus, with You.

Your voice is powerful, and Your words are radiant bright

In Your breath and shadow, I will come close and abide

You whisper love and life divine, and Your fellowship is free

Draw me closer, O my Lord, draw me closer, Lord, to Thee

Captivate us, Lord Jesus, set our eyes on You

Devastate us, with Your presence, falling down

Rushing River, draw us nearer

Holy Fountain, consume us with You

Captivate us, Lord Jesus, with You.

And let everything be lost in the shadow

Of the light of Your face

And let every chain be broken from me

As I'm bound in Your grace

For Your yoke is easy, Your burden is light

You're full of wisdom, power, and might

And every eye will see You.

--Captivate Us, by Watermark